The Nextians

Weezer, Surf Wax America

2012-02-10T13:18:00.001-08:00

Weezer used to rock so hard

Jeremy Lin is Better Than LeBron James

2012-02-09T12:30:00.000-08:00

I heard on the NBA TV's that Jeremy Lin's first two starts with at least 20 points and 8 assists hasn't been done since LeBron James was a rookie. Not to mention Lin's first game of this run, three games ago, where he entered during the last part of the 1st Quarter vs. The Nyets and scored 25 with 8 helpers. The kid seemingly hasn't been off the hardwood since he first entered that game.

Taiwanese Americans everywhere are going crazy. So are Palo Alto Americans. So are Harvard Americans. So is Tyson Chandler who now gets the ball in dunking territory because an injured 'Melo isn't ball-stopping out on the perimeter. So is Walt Clyde Frasier who has been reading the dictionary like crazy for new Lin-centric Clyde-ism's to spit during the replays.

Lin destroys the Jazz at MSG with swagger

Lin upstages John Wall (again)

Oh yeah, and without Melo and Amare the Knicks have won all three of Lin's games.

If Jeremy Lin doesn't make the Rookie/Sophomore game at All Star Weekend I'm gonna be so pissed.

Will Farrell Introduces Bulls @ Hornets

2012-02-09T11:29:00.001-08:00

The full version not cut up by ESPN

Jeremy Lin Explodes

2012-02-06T16:22:00.000-08:00

Our former Warrior and Bay Area native went off this weekend! And, no, it wasn't in the D-League again. With Baron Davis not yet being ~~skinny enough~~ healthy to play, Iman Shumpert really being a SG, Mike Bibby being Mike Bibby, Toney Douglas showing his 8th man abilities, the PG strapped NY Knicks needed nothing more than a Lin outburst in this last leg of back-to-back-to-back games. Jeremy got in the game early and never came out. He blew by Deron Williams, made Kris Humphries look like the non-basketball player that he is, and led the NYK's back from an early deficit to be the 2nd biggest story in NY this weekend. Even Carmelo gave him a nice show of respect with an Asian bow which Lin gladly reciprocated.

Warriors fans will always have a soft spot for Jeremy Lin in their fan hearts. I'm glad he's making waves and hope it continues long enough to justify fantasy ownability.

Thanks to Grantlandia

Kevin Love Face Stomp

2012-02-06T14:23:00.000-08:00

Kevin Love is on a mission to prove to all other NBA Power Forwards that he is the best in the Association. In his latest conquest, Kevin goes HAM and stomps on Luis Scola's face after Luis tries to sell a foul. Man, Kevin must really hate Euro Flopping. But Luis doesn't care.

Minnesota fans point to the face stomp being a reaction to the nut shot Scola gave KLove last week. The retaliation always gets caught. Remember that, kids.

Kevin was suspended 2 games for the kerb smash. But David Kahn fans, don't worry, Ricky will save you with two triple doubles (steals) in your next two games. Ricky is so dreamy.

Thanks to Sportz Ill-Ustrated
Thanks to SB Nation too.

2/2/12: Jazz @ Warriors

2012-02-03T12:04:00.001-08:00

Curry and Monta decided to play basketball last night.

Shut It Down! Let's Go Home!

2012-02-03T11:53:00.000-08:00

Finals MVP Dirk Nowitzki was recently out 4 games in order to get back into playing shape. During that time he sat in on the Mav's announcer table and had some epic comments during a 2nd quarter JET to Brandon Wright alley-oop. Apparently, the oop was so good that Dirk advised everyone to shut it down and go home. The oop put the Mavs up 37-31 over the Timberwolves and with over half the game remaining it was obvious that the Mavs were going to win the game. Oops have a way of doing that.

The problem is that the Mavericks ended up losing 90-105 at home. David Khan is glad that they didn't shut it down.

Carmelo's Crunchtime Offense

2012-01-24T12:23:00.000-08:00

Melo went to the Kobe School of Krunchtime Offense this offseason

Melo has been shooting terribly this year at just over 40%.. The Knicks are losing to everyone. Amare can't get enough shots up because Melo hogs the ball and slows down the pace. D'Antoni is going to get fired because he's not able to win with Ammelo. NY is relying on a terribly out of shape Baron Davis to give them a spark after he comes back from an injury that caused Cleveland to amnesty his ass and has kept him out all season. The Knicks only bright spot is recalling Jeremy Lin from their D-League Erie team who played one game, messed around, and got a triple double. But as Warriors fans we know what putting hope in Jeremy Lin eventually leads to.

Here to save you

Thanks to Posting and Toasting for much of this information....or at least links to information I eventually found elsewhere on the internets.

Durant Flag Football

2012-01-23T16:59:00.000-08:00

I'm not sure why I never posted this awesome video of how awesome Kevin Durant is. Awesome.

The Other Dream Team

2012-01-23T13:39:00.000-08:00

My mom wouldn't let me buy a tie-died Lithuanian shirt in Middle School

In 1992 the Lithuania national basketball team won the Olympic Bronze Medal by defeating their former occupier. This one looks like some serious waterworks for fans of international politics, basketball, and Sarunas Marciulionis. I mean, Jim friging Lampley is crying in it!

Thanks to True Hoop for the lead.

Pacers @ Warriors 1/20/12

2012-01-21T13:43:00.000-08:00

The Warriors lost the game this time.

Philadelphia 76ers Mascot

2012-01-19T15:48:00.000-08:00

Big Daddy is the new mascot of the 76ers.

Speaking of the 76ers, Cuba Gooding Jr. said "rock out with your cock out" on Sports Center today.

Thanks to Barstool Sports

Ever Wonder Who Blake Griffin's Parents Are?

2012-01-18T22:00:00.000-08:00

Tommy, Blake & Gail Griffin

Have you ever wondered who Blake Griffin's parents are? I have. Tommy is his dad and was a basketball center and track standout at NAIA Northwest Oklahoma University. Blake's older brother, Taylor, used to play for the Phoenix Suns last year before he was demoted to the D-League. Now he's playing in Belgium. Blake grew up and is good friends with current St. Louis Rams QB Sam Bradford. Gail Griffin, Blake and Taylor's mother, home schooled the boys until Taylor was in 10th(!) grade and Blake was in 8th. Gail also has red hair.

Warriors @ Cavs 1/17/12

2012-01-17T22:06:00.000-08:00

A solid road win. The Cavs are actually playing well this year, sukkas!

Warriors @ Pistons 1/15/12

2012-01-16T22:08:00.000-08:00

It's not hard to beat the Pistons these days. Even in Detroit where nobody is showing up to their games. So sad.

Mark Jackson -- Biggest Coaching Flop So Far?

2012-01-13T17:19:00.000-08:00

Bionic Blue Arms cannot help Dwight from the stripe....but that's OK

The Warriors played pretty well last night. They jumped out to an early lead, inevitably lost it, and even came back to tie the score with under 1:30 left (if my memory serves me correct). But Coach Mark Jackson may have made the biggest mistake in his short coaching tenure last night when he implemented "hack-a-How" in the 2nd quarter and then again deep into the 2nd half allowing Superman to attempt 39 free throws, an Association record surpassing the 34 Wilt Chamberlain attempted 67 years ago (or something pretty close to that).

Dwight was shooting about 45% from the line this year. He's a 59.5% career shooter and you have to assume that when someone shoots 39 times from the line in one game he's going to revert more towards his career average than his season average (unless your name is Andris Biedrins).

As John Hollinger analyzes in today's PER Diem, 59.5% from the line leads to 1.19 points per possession. If you are intentionally OK with this, then you are intentionally OK with the greatest offense of all time. And this doesn't even account for the times where Dwight misses the back end of a 2 shot foul and his teammates secure the rebound for another valuable possession.

Bottom line, Hack-a-brick doesn't work on Dwight and Mark Jackson most likely just coached himself to a loss in a game that his team could have won outright.

And if you hate numbers, just know that the crowd's enthusiasm was completely sucked out of the rOracle last night. I remember announcer Steve Kerrrrr mentioning this.

Magic @ Warriors 1/12/12

2012-01-13T11:31:00.000-08:00

Dwight Howard shoots free throws with raptor arms like Shawn Marion. Except that Shawn Marion actually makes shots.

Torn Pectorals

2012-01-13T11:12:00.000-08:00

I didn't feel like tracking down pictures of Kwame and Horford. SORRY.

Dude, there were two torn pectoral muscles announced yesterday on centers causing them to miss significant time. Kwame Brown and Al Horford. How weird is that?

1/11/12: Warriors Beat Heat

2012-01-12T17:33:00.000-08:00

It started off as gumbyorpokey. Last year it was the infamous orangino. I thought all hope was lost for this season as the NBA web sweepers took off these prior YouTube accounts which put together great highlight packages of every Warrior game. They wouldn't just play a few Warrior made shots and call it a clip show. They'd let the announcers talk, they'd show the flow of the game which included Warrior turnovers, missed shots, as well as great plays by the other team. They'd of course show Warrior Owner Joe Lacob going apeshit (8:18 mark of video below).

Now they are back! As gumbyandpokey, a hidden youtube account, and access that I won't share unless you IM me on AOL, I can hopefully post the storytime clips for all Warriors games this shortened season. Enjoy Tuesday's comeback victory over the Heatles. Gumby/Pokey/Orangino is back serving us all. Amen, brother:

Warriors Beat Heat 1/10/11

2012-01-11T21:44:00.000-08:00

Down 17 points a few minutes into the 3rd Quarter, Golden State began to turn it on. The Big Threetles began to crap the bed and Nate Rob chipped in some great bench points with Dorell Wright finally having a decent game (it took long enough, DORELL!) vs. his former team.

This all caused Warrior Owner Joe Lacob to freak the hell out:

If you didn't happen to "Witness" the game (and LeBron's crunch time settle-jumpers) read about it HERE

Gustavo Ayon

2012-01-09T23:08:00.000-08:00

1/9/12 NO/DEN Screenshot

Harlan, Barkley & Miller Behind The Scenes

2012-01-06T13:51:00.001-08:00

Chuck talks about Weight Watchers, Harlan calls the Hawks terrible. Good times!

Ultimate Bench Guy

2012-01-05T20:25:00.000-08:00

If only Isetta and I were this smart sitting on MC's JV bench 18 years ago.

High School Hardass

2012-01-05T19:58:00.000-08:00

Some Dad/fan of the team in the visiting maroon jerseys decided to compile these crazy fouls from the fat kid on the white team. These refs are actually better than what I'm used to. Foul #5 would have been called a jump ball in the Novato Park & Rec Sunday League.

I would have thought the maroon flag waiving parents would have been a bit more pissed in real time about this. Especially after that kid got laid out. I know they were in enemy territory and all but aren't there a few dads or chippy moms out there would would have at least yelled at the ref? Way to protect your kids, parents.

It's worth it to read the commentary HERE. Also, find your way to the youtube comments to see how crazy people are.

Weekly Chat

2012-01-04T11:21:00.000-08:00

Draftboard of proof

OG Nextian and Bilbo are back! talking about The Nextian live in-person draft that took place a few weeks ago. We decided to go through each round and offer our critique. Enjoy the rambling.

What Bilbo did during summer vacation

What OG Nextian did

OG Nextian: Bilbo, the Association games have finally started and what a Christmas gift indeed. In these first three days we’ve learned that the Lakers, Mavericks, and Celtics are done for, the Clippers will win the West, and that the Heatles will run a version of Oregon football’s spread offense in basketball form all the way to the Larry O’Brien trophy. Of course both of us had an amazing performance in THE Nextians official fantasy basketball draft ‘11/’12 by our current one – two standing after three full days. This should be an epic battle atop the leader board all season long as there is no doubt in my mind that our teams will finish at least 20 points ahead of everyone else in THE Nextians league. So let’s go through each round and discuss any surprises or reaches. Why don’t you tell me 1) your feelings on having 10 of 12 Nextians DOING IT LIVE at Toddmy’s apartment for the draft, and, B) what your thoughts were on the 1^st 3 rounds of Nextians drafting. Any surprises or solid picks you liked?

OG BILBO: I found the experience eye-opening. The first thing I noticed was that most of the guys in the league were not prepared. I always pictured my fellow managers at their computers during a draft meticulously picking according to a carefully planned draft strategy. That is definitely not the case. It was striking how unprepared some of the managers were. I won’t name names, but there was a certain Sacto Rookie drafted about 38 rounds too early. People have been kicked out of leagues for less. But I digress. The first 3 rounds went as expected more or less. I think on paper “The Champs” made out like a bandito taking D-Wade, Amare and John Wall with his first 3 picks. Sure the TOs could kill him, but that’s a great start to a winning team. I also think Steph Curry at the end of the 2^nd rd could be an incredible selection, assuming his ankle issues calm down. And I think Tommy taking Danny Granger in the 3^rd was a smart call. The one reach was Ginobli in the 2^nd. Do I really need to say why? And of course I was happy to land Crash Wallace in the 3^rd round. He fits perfectly into my team building strategy and at least for my squad was a steal.

OG Nextian: I would say there were about 3 unprepared managers. I too was surprising to see that there were that many slackers. True colors were revealed at the draft! And here I always thought that THE Nextians put together algorithmic spreadsheets upon 37 hours of pre-draft preparation on their laptops. I mean, some of us definitely do that but others fly by the seat of their pants hanging onto strong finishes of lucky drafts in the past and thinking that it will repeat.

The other thing that I noticed was that there were some guys who stuck to a strategy and others who rolled with the punches of a draft creating their team on the fly. It was fun to see both strategeries in action. Also, I felt that some managers who I thought were quick thinkers took their time in drafting a pick. They really wanted to make sure they were doing the right thing. Whereas other guys took a while to pick because they were thoroughly unprepared and didn’t even know they were on deck to pick (obviously the 3 unprepared managers).

Going back to The Champs I felt that he used his knowledge well to put together a good few rounds. Noah in the 4^th balanced his team well but then he lost me with drafting DumbMarcus, Beasley, and Stephen Jackson in rounds 5-8. It could work out but that’s too much crazy for me. If Turd’s dream of “crazy points” ever came true The Champs would easily get 12 roto points.

Jimmer in the 5^th was amazing. That was at least about 7 rounds early. I think that Team Jimmer is the one squad who may have relegated himself to a bottom 3 finish. I do know that he’ll finish last in points. Who will average over 18 points on that team aside from Love? I think that Monta’s Mobile took a big hit with Brook Lopez in the 5^th going down for the season the very next day. That’s a kind of pick that will really be hard to bounce back from. When looking at rounds 4-6 the eternal fantasy basketball couple Timmay and Turd picked really well. Timmay’s Joe Johnson, Nene and Bargnani picks were great and Turd aced it with Millsap, McGee and Gallinari. In rounds 4-6 you do need quality players and it’s much too early to draft a flier (too young or too old) in my humble opinion.

Did you see any quality in rounds 7-10 that worked out well for teams? I guess this is where you start to draft said fliers but there is still some great quality there. Also, what are your thoughts strategy in these rounds?

OG BILBO: The middle rounds are by far my favorite portion of the draft. This is where you round out your starting line ups and take chances on sleeper picks. After these rounds it turns into a crapshoot so this is where you can really improve your team’s chances. I think Kris Kardashian in the 9^th was a great pick for your squad and guys like Afflalo, Amir Johnson, Teague, Jordan, Landry Fields and Kyrie Irving will all perform better than where they were selected.

OG Nextian: In rounds 7-10 you went with some quality guys in Batum, Teague, George and Steady Eddie Maggette. There’s some potential with those 7, 8, and 9 round picks. And, well, Maggette has a terrible assist to turnover ratio but does get to the line a bunch.

In Rounds 11-15 I liked a few picks. There’s so much garbage or sleeper potential here but I have to say that if you do it right you will get guys who will contribute to your team all season long. Remember, a fantasy basketball team can only stand so many sleepers or dirt balls. That being said, I liked guys like Tony Allen, Budinger, Carl Landry and Jamal Crawford. And if Jamison plays well I could have just started “Jamison-gate” by not making it explicitly clear to all who weren’t listening that Josh drafted Kemba Walker in the 9^th thereby making Antwan available with me grabbing him in the 12^th. But, hey, there’s always a So n’ So–gate in every fantasy league we play in.

The 15^th and final round was funny to me. First of all, Hinkey decides not to make a pick while smart managers like you and Timmay grab Al “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle” Harrington and Mo Williams. You see, one doesn’t have to pick a shit bag or swing for a jonrón in the last round. You can actually draft someone who will totally start for you team if one thing goes their way.

Any more thoughts on the draft or should I just post this thing already? I know you will act like a lawyer and rap this draft talk up in a nice little wiener package for all of us. All I have to say is that guys who complain how long a draft takes and who are also the main culprits for how long a draft is taking need to figure things out.

OG Bilbo: yes, you are right. I'm enjoying 1st place at the moment and you're not too far behind. Obviously we are amazing Nextians.

OG Nextian: agreed.

Space n' Pace

2011-12-29T16:03:00.000-08:00

Nextians have been asking just what the hell I was referring to when mentioning the Erik Spoelstra Oregon Ducks Spread Offense that he is implementing in Miami. Linkage below.

............./´¯/)...........(\¯`\
............/....//..............\\....\
.........../....//................\\....\
...../´¯/..../´¯\.........../¯`\....\¯`\
.././.../..../..../.|_......_|.\....\....\...\.\..
(.(....(....(..../.)..)..(..(.\....)....)....).)
.\................\/.../....\...\/................/
..\................. /........\................../
....\..............(............)............../
......\.............\.........../............./

Link

Gavin Maloof Loves Beating The Lakers

2011-12-29T10:24:00.000-08:00

Gavin decided to catch the game fresh off his business meeting at a steakhouse (click to open .gif)

Yes, beating the Lakers is an awesome thing. Now if the Kings could only put someone on their team who could pass. Trading Udrih for Salmons was awesome, btw.

DumbMarcus Cousins Hollinger Player Card

2011-12-28T13:12:00.000-08:00

I was reading through the team player profiles that ESPN's Vegas Beater John Hollinger put together for this NBA season and got a huge kick while reading the ~~Anaheim~~ Sacramento Kings. Although it is strange for me, a 6'3" white dude, to call the 6'10" 280 lb starting PF of the Kings "dumb" I do it out of love. The Kings are one of my favorite teams and I want them back to the ole' Kings of yesteryear. Part of getting there is for DumbMarcus to lose his Nextian Nickname and reach his potential. Until then, he will be highlighted on this here blog.

You can't help but laugh at what Hollinger puts together regarding Mr. Cousins:

DeMARCUS COUSINS, PF

Projection: 21.1 pts, 11.7 reb, 4.7 ast per 40 min; 16.04 PER
• Talented big man who can overpower foes in paint. Has poor shot selection.
• Poorly conditioned, needs to lose weight. Has had attitude problems.
• Has shown passing skill but takes terrible chances. Must improve defense.

It's difficult to compress all my thoughts on Cousins into a concise summary, because there was so much to like ... and so much to dislike. The range of potential outcomes here is enormous. If you told me he was out of the league in five years, it wouldn't shock me. If you told me he was an MVP candidate, that wouldn't surprise me either. He really is tremendously talented, but between all his personal red flags and the half-wit organization surrounding him, it's an open question whether he'll come anywhere close to hitting his lofty ceiling.

Cousins averaged a point every two minutes and ranked eighth among power forwards in rebound rate, but he might have been the most inefficient player in basketball. Despite enviable passing skills he posted a pathetic minus-5.71 pure point rating, a number that surpassed only four other players in the league. Turnovers were the root of the problem, as Cousins would throw passes from the high post regardless of whether his target was open, set illegal screens by the dozen and generally handle the ball like he was discarding a used tissue. The crazy thing is that he can really pass out of the post when he's double-teamed, and he sees the floor in the open court too.

That might have been OK if his shot selection wasn't so awful. Cousins shot only 43.2 percent, an amazingly low figure for a physically dominant big man. He drew a high rate of free throws but could have pushed the envelope much further. Instead, he tended to settle for high-arcing fadeaways and other assorted bad shots. In particular, he struggled on short-range shots off his postups but he kept on forcing them up. From 3-to-9 feet, Cousins shot only 30.4 percent, but he took 283 shots from there -- per minute, only seven players tried more.

Lowest percentage of at-rim baskets assisted, frontcourt players, 2010-11

Player	Team	Pct. assisted
DeMarcus Cousins	Sac	32.5
Zach Randolph	Mem	48.0
Dirk Nowitzki	Dal	48.4
David West	NO	48.5
Al Harrington	Den	49.6
Min. 500 minutes

It should be mentioned that Cousins got phenomenally little help from his guards. Only 37.6 percent of his baskets were assisted, by far the least of any big. Wait, it gets worse. Only 32.5 percent of his shots at the rim came with an assist, which is completely ridiculous. This was the lowest figure of any non-point guard in basketball except one (see Tyreke Evans comment), and among big men the difference is preposterous (see chart) -- Zach Randolph was the next-closest player at 48.0.

Defensively, Cousins struggled -- partly because of inexperience, partly because of indifference, and partly because he's out of shape and needs to lose weight. His biggest problem was fouling, as he gave one every seven minutes (the third-worst rate among power forwards) and as a result was often fighting foul trouble. That only worsened his defensive malaise, unfortunately, as he'd leave the gate open to avoid another whistle. Despite those issues, his overall defensive numbers were fairly solid. Cousins controlled the boards, and he has the size to handle post players, plus he has fast hands and ranked 11th among power forwards in steals per minute.

Overall, it feels like we're watching the new Hot Plate Williams. There's no question about the talent, but whether Cousins will ever harness it remains in considerable doubt.

Kobe Bashes Kwame Brown

2011-12-27T17:01:00.000-08:00

Kobe Bryant didn't like playing with Kwame Brown. Thankfully Kwame helped the Warriors upset the Chicago Bulls with 4 steals of his own last night.

NBA Town Hall; Curry+Durant+Amar'e

2011-12-23T11:28:00.000-08:00

Scissor!

This is something to play over your laptop through your bluetooth speakers at home in preparation for the Christmas games

BOOM

Listening to Aldridge change his vernacular is hilarious. He doesn't sound like that on the sidelines or on NBA TV. I guess that's how he gets these guys to open up?

Highlights

Steph's New Year's resolution is to only eat 1 pack of candy/day
Amar'e has vowed to positively influence the local youth
Amar'e eats through half the town hall

THE Nextians '11/'12 Draft Board

2011-12-22T12:01:00.000-08:00

I'd advise a Nextian to enlarge this picture

Last night THE Nextians had a fantasy basketball draft and it was awesome.

Dumbmarcus Returns

2011-12-21T12:57:00.000-08:00

Dumbmarcus Pre-Game Ritual

Dumbmarcus Cousins missed his first pre-season game vs. the Warriors. But he made his '11/'12 debut last night to rave reviews. 29 minutes, 2/9 from the field, 2/7 from the line, 10 rebounds, 9 turnovers. It looks like he's really put the rookie season immaturity behind him in order to dominate this season.

Goodbye Warriors Season

2011-12-21T12:15:00.000-08:00

Curry couldn't believe that Monta "allegedly" sexted a Dubs Employee

First, Monta is getting sued for sexting while married. And then Steph injures his surgically repaired right ankle.

What's the spread for the Christmas Night game hosting Lob City? I'll take the Clippers.

Draft Order Picking

2011-12-19T17:13:00.000-08:00

First of all, Bilbo and the Cammish can't count. Which leads to some great comedy as you will see.

I was busy trying to record and be lame at the same time. So my losing count is excusable. But Bilbo must have just been anxious to be on camera. At least this is how I explained it to my wife.

And if you're still with us, here's the video of the Stuff Draft. Pulling names out of the weiner sock was fun, but I couldn't figure out enough stuff to draft for. Plus, I'm really busy at work.

LeBron in 2012

2011-12-14T15:39:00.000-08:00

In a shortened season, many pick the Miami Heat to win it all. They've improved their team, have a year of experience under their waistbands, and LeBron is tired of playing the villain. Wait, what?

Aside from continuing to pimp an addictive cold sore and chapped lips remedy LBJ is taking a new post-Decision mindset into this season. He's no longer going to be The Villain as Windhorst explains in this piece right here.

Wait LeBron, you can't just decide to not be a dick in the eyes of the fans. You can control a lot of things with your incredible skill, power, money and fame. But you cannot control what people think of you. Especially when there's stories out there like THIS.

Here's to the Heat being odds on favorites to win it all this shortened season with LBJ still being hated by the people.

Power Balance Arena

2011-12-06T15:23:00.000-08:00

Bilbo rocks a pink one when he plays softball

We've all heard the claims: little magnets in a bracelet will give you better balance, improved digestion, help you sleep better, provide smoother bowel movements, and replace your need for Cialis. Well, most of those health benefits were claimed by Power Balance.

I'm pooping much better now

But these claims are total bullshiz according to something know as THE law.

So many NBA geniuses wore Power Balance that the cash strapped ~~Maloofs~~ ~~Anaheim~~ Sacramento Kings decided to sign a mult-year stadium naming rights deal with a company that couldn't and can't stop the rampant Chinese counterfeiting of it's one and only stupid product all over eBay.

Maloof Sister: Real Housewife of Spending Daddy's Money

Dale Kasler of The Sacramento Bee: When sports-wristband maker Power Balance LLC filed for bankruptcy protection last month, the company insisted it would keep its name on the Sacramento Kings' arena. Now it looks like the name could be coming down less than a year after it went up. Cash-starved Power Balance expects to be sold soon, and court papers say the likely buyer doesn't plan to maintain the marketing deal that turned the former Arco Arena into Power Balance Pavilion. That could change between now and Dec. 20, when Power Balance's business is scheduled to be auctioned off. Hanyang LLC, the Southern California company in line to buy Power Balance, could choose to retain the contract with the Kings after all. Someone could outbid Hanyang and decide to keep the Kings' deal. "Don't jump to any conclusions," said Denny Barge, a principal in Hanyang. He indicated Hanyang didn't have all the data it needed on the Kings deal when it made its bid for Power Balance. (thanks to TrueHoop)

Tiger Woods Wins!

2011-12-06T10:41:00.000-08:00

Did you hear that Tiger won his first tournament in 749 days this past weekend? Here's the full story in Taiwanese animation:

John Wall in High School

2011-12-05T17:40:00.000-08:00

Before he danced the Dougie and became the 2010 #1 overall pick, John Wall was dominating in High School. Keep in mind that he's a point guard.

Everyone's To Blame

2011-11-20T11:31:00.000-08:00

Especially Turd Ferguson.

Check out Simmons entertaining analysis of what brought on the Nuclear Winter.

Jason Otter is Back!

2011-11-18T17:01:00.001-08:00

Jason's crossover video starts off a little slow but then it really starts to pick up in intensity.

Occupy The NBA

2011-11-15T15:46:00.000-08:00

"Man, the Mavs are gonna be 2011 AND 2012 Champs!"

Well, this is it. Nuclear Winter as Czar Stern puts it. It sounds like these guys have screwed up our season as THE Nextians. What a bunch of dicks. Everyone is to blame. They were THISCLOSE to having a deal last week. It was a few million mid-level exception dollars that one side could have caved on to save a 72 game season and look like guys who know how to get things done. Instead, the long con owners wouldn't rise up to pay, and the players holding their "system issues" rally cry wouldn't budge. Player reps were allowed to vote instead of the entire Players Association (fail) and Paul Pierce is getting Player Agents to file copious amounts of disrupting lawsuits. Congrats to all. A well played hand.

JA Adande breaks it down for a Nextian HERE
Wojo questions the guardians of the game HERE
And to dull there pains of no NBA Action Nextians must click HERE

Baron Didn't Scare The Owners

2011-10-03T09:54:00.000-07:00

Unfortunately, Baron Davis' "Hobo-Style" and menacing gaze didn't work with the Owners as they put their feet up and didn't budge on the BRI percentage. It looks like we'll be missing many games, Nextians. And that is sad.

Jerry West is Awesome/Crazy

2011-09-12T11:47:00.000-07:00

The Logo is an interesting man

Check out some excerpts from Jerry West's forthcoming autobiography. Sounds pretty juicy to me!

Veronica Falls -- Come on Over

2011-09-01T17:12:00.001-07:00

Shaq on Conan

2011-08-17T10:22:00.001-07:00

Shaq did an awful lot of crazy ish on Conan on 8/3/11:

Matt Barnes Punching Away at SF Pro Am

2011-08-10T16:57:00.000-07:00

The SF Pro-Am League at Kezar Pavilion in San Francisco is a great time out (GTO). A lot of good college and pro players come out and play a 7 game season followed by playoffs for the basketball fans of The City. Most of the games are very entertaining and watching a game a Kezar is an experience because it is so different from normal basketball gyms. It's quirky old school SF at it's finest and players love the floor which seems to be spring loaded.

I'm not sure why Matt Barnes continues to play in this Summer League. Maybe he can't get an invite to Rucker Park or the Dyckman League in Washington. Maybe he's somehow loyal to the Bay Area. He was born and raised in Sacramento and made some serious NBA coin by his efforts on the 2007 We Believe Warriors. But last summer Matt Barnes slapped an opposing coach in the face. Now he goes off and punches a College of Marin (COM!) player in the ear after he got boxed out too hard. Scroll to 2:00 to see the aftermath of the punching:

The Marin IJ had the inside scoop and was actually linked to from True Hoop if you can believe it. Dillon Sabia was the MCAL Player of the Year in 2009 while attending Drake High School. Which I can walk to from my house in less than 5 minutes.

The Dyckman League: Durant vs. Beasley

2011-08-09T12:31:00.000-07:00

This highlight package of Durant's team vs. Beasley's team in the Dyckman League (a 501 c 3 Non Profit in Washington Heights) is entertaining I must admit. Durant and Beasley are schooling one another in this highlight tape.

But then Beasley goes and ruins the good times by yelling at the fans "I get paid to do this ni**a!" and eventually pushing one in the face. He goes on to say that "I'm done, I'm done" with playing this particular game. The fans seem a little confused and uncomfortable as seen in the looks on the faces of the groupies who walk across the court during a stoppage of plan. Can this now be considered the Summer of Beasley Officially Going Crazy?

I also enjoyed the mix tape essential sound effects "beep beep beep" horn. Classic. Why hasn't an NBA PA Team picked up on this? Not that it wouldn't get annoying if overused. But just the right amount of "beep beep beep" gets anyone fired up.

Manute Bol: True Association Stories

2011-08-05T16:42:00.000-07:00

Manute and Mugsy

I once slapped Manute Bol a five. It was a high 5 for me, I remember having to jump up to reach his outstretched hand. It was a low 5 for Manute. He just hung his gangly limb down for me to slap.

I was 12 years old coming from the bowels of Oakland Coliseum (now know as rOracle Arena) with my fellow Loma Verde Jammers teammates. We were going to match up against the Our Lady of Loretto Wildcats for an intense game of halftime entertainment for the rabid Golden State Warriors fans. The Warriors were coming off the floor headed to the locker room to strategize with coach Don Nelson. They were battling the Portland Trail Blazers that night and Manute ended up with 10 blocks. Obviously he made a difference in this contest!

The Warriors that season featured Chris Mullin, Terry Teagle, Mitch Richmond, Rod Higgins and Winston Garland. The Dubs that year went 43-39, beat the Jazz in Round 1 of the playoffs, and lost in the Conference Semi's to the Suns. It was a great season by Warriors standards. Heck, the Warriors even had the young Steve Alford and John Starks on the bench.

After slapping 5's we made our way to the court. The floor looked huge even though it was the same size as Hill Gym in Novato. It probably had something to do with the 15,025 seats that surrounded the court. Most were obviously empty as fans were getting more beer, hitting the head, or waiting in line for processed meat snacks. But I still remember the crowd noise when we made a shot, stole the ball, or bounced a dribble off of our foot out of bounds. The biggest roar came when there was an 8 kid pile up at mid court as we hustled for the loose ball.

I remember bricking a wide-open jumper that would have given us the first points of the "game". We lost 4-2 with the low scoring being attributed to the absolute shock of 6th graders playing on the Coliseum floor during halftime of an actual NBA game. Thankfully, the Jammers never once lost a game to the Wildcats in games that counted winning the Novato Championship 3 years in a row. This is still a hilarious antidote to share with former Jammers and Wildcats when we run into each other. After the exhibition, one of my teammates saw Jerry Rice a few rows back and shook his hand. The experience was incredible. It is burned in my memory.

Bol and Spud Webb were on the same semi-pro team after college

The Bay Area at the time was fascinated by Manute. Here was a 7'7" Sudanese man, skinny as heck, with a funny accent who would shoot occasional 3's and block tons of shots (4.3 blocks in 22 minutes/night that season). After getting dunked on by Michael Jordan, he supposedly invented the phrase "My bad." I remember Don Nelson talking about how he couldn't play more than 25 minutes a night because of his size. He would just get too tired and his frame couldn't take more than that.

Manute played two seasons in Golden State before being traded to Philly for 1st a Round Draft Pick that the Warriors used to get Chris Gatling. Bol returned to the Warriors at the end of his NBA career in 1995 to play just 5 games before retiring.

Don Nelson loved Manute. We loved Manute. Heck, even Charles Barkley loved Manute:
In Philadelphia, Bol fast became friends with Charles Barkley. "You know, a lot of people feel sorry for him, because he's so tall and awkward," Barkley said of Bol in a 1990 SI feature. "But I'll tell you this -- if everyone in the world was a Manute Bol, it's a world I'd want to live in. He's smart. He reads The New York Times. He knows what's going on in a lot of subjects. He's not one of these just-basketball guys. Basketball's just one percent of it. You know what he was talking about the other day? Milk. He was saying that he grew up on milk straight from the cow. Squeezed it himself. Milk. He says, 'Charlie, what's this lo-fat milk, this two percent milk, all of this other milk? Cows don't give lo-fat milk, two percent milk. We shouldn't drink it.' I don't know. Maybe he's got something."

Bol was active after his retirement. He continued to play pro basketball in lesser leagues. He was on Fox's Celebrity Boxing in 2002 defeated William "The Refrigerator" Perry by unanimous decision. That same year he also signed a one day contract with Indianapolis Ice in the Central Hockey League. Because he couldn't skate, Bol never made an appearance in the game. Bol became the tallest jockey ever in by racing in the Indiana Horse Racing Commission.

As this TrueHoop piece points out, Manute loved to drink Heineken and stay out late. Manute was seen as a side show to a lot of people. But Bol was dedicated to the Sudanese liberation and his humanitarian efforts in engulfed the last years of his life. I would advise reading the TrueHoop piece, checking out an excerpt of the e-book over at Sports Illustrated, and possibly even purchasing the e-book at The Atavist.

These memories from my teen years are brought up learning about Bol. And all Nextians should know the full story of Manute.

The Boy Scouts -- OKC Thunder

2011-08-03T12:29:00.000-07:00

The NBA World is not going well right now. The lockout looms on with lawspeak and verbal ninja warfare that I don't care to interpret. I understand the NBA writers need to write about something aside from the Lockout but breaking down Slovenia's offense for EuroBasket is just taking it too damn far. I can't justify spending 40 minutes learning the minutia of their incredible motion offense. 20 minutes is my limit.

And then I realize that Free Darko doesn't post any more and I get even more sad/mad. I mean, we will never again see great interpretations like this:

Always Be Prepared

This is such great art and I can't even buy it for my mancave anymore! Damnit! What the heck is happening to basketball land! What did I do wrong as a fan to deserve this!?

Thankfully, I can get my anger out during my mini hoop game later this evening. Those bastard Suns are going down! From Vermont, it's the OG Cammish Nextian signing off.

Kevin Durant Dominates Ruker Park

2011-08-02T17:28:00.000-07:00

KD dropped 66 at Rucker Park last night. Thank god for awesome quality handheld cameras because this is some HD goodness. The first is a clip of KD thwapping 4 3's in a row. On the 4th make, he gets absolutely mobbed by the crowd forcing the whistles to be blown and time to be called. You gotta love how stoked those fans were.

Man, that reminds me of a league game in the '08 Vermont Mini Hoop quarter finals. I was on fire from three and with this 5'8" kid crowding me from deep I just broke him off the dribble and slammed one down all fierce Shawn Kemp-style. The mini ball rolled over the barrier and into the bushes so they had to stop the game and go get it. The dudes who were playing after us started giving me hi-fives n' stuff and I was all stoked on my steez.

Anyway, here is a longer clip of KD's game if the first vid got you all hyped. It's tough for me to notice the difference in the jerseys until a few minutes in. Sort of weird. But I love the way Durant is schooling some pretty good ballers, aka Junior College All Stars. It just goes to show you how much better NBA'ers are than even the best local baller. You gotta love KD spreading the basketball gospel. Also, Sam Presti must be stoked watching this footy.

Mini Hoops League

2011-08-02T10:40:00.000-07:00

Apparently a bunch of average white kids from Vermont started a 3 on 3 mini hoops league with 8 foot rims, a 50 foot court (regulation = 96 feet) and a small ball. Thanks to Barstool Boston for the video. While it's easy to palm and slam a mini ball, it's tough to shoot from range. So props to the "Blazers" for nailing so many "long range" "jumpers". These dooods obviously take their mini hoops league seriously with full NBA uniforms n' shit (aside from that one guy who is wearing a t-shirt on the "Wizards"....must have been a fill in because his game sucked).

Hopefully Bilbo can quickly build a 50' by 20' asphalt box in his back yard so we can start our own league. We can film the games from his raised deck (so viewers can't tell how short the players and the hoops are) and put the highlights with a terrible hip hop soundtrack on youtube each week. The vids will get so many hits that we'll share in youtube ad revenue and not have to work anymore. Things will be great, which means that they will eventually go bad (shit, even Slamball isn't here anymore). The Novato Park and Rec will ask us to stop the league because we'll be taking away too many squads from the Sunday night leagues which is pretty much their bread and butter as a city. We'll get so big that we'll eventually have to buy insurance instead of kegs for the mandatory half time beer pound because Mencer will have gotten hurt diving into the wall and will sue us.

So maybe I'll just stick to playing real basketball, staying in shape, and just playing HORSE in Bilbo's backyard on his regulation 10' hoop instead. But a Nextian can dream, can't he? CAN'T HE!??

NBA Hair Awesomeness; Dwayne Schintzius

2011-07-29T10:44:00.000-07:00

OK: I found a topic that I'm really fired up to write about during the lockout. And that is the best of NBA Hair. I know that this is already covered around the internets and Free Darko's Undisputed Guide to Professional Basketball History had an awesome hair chapter. But it is fun nonetheless.

Today's NBA Hair Awesomeness is, Dwayne Schintzius:

Mulletude

Model

7'1"

The 7-foot-1 Schintzius played for the Gators from 1987-90, starting all 110 games he played in, averaging 14.8 points. In 1989, he was an Associated Press and Sporting News All-American and earned first-team All-SEC honors when he led the Gators in scoring (18) and rebounding (9.7). He is the only player in SEC history with more than 1,000 points, 800 rebounds, 250 assists and 250 blocks. He holds the UF record for blocks.

He was a member of Florida’s first SEC championship team (1988-89), and was a first-round draft choice of the San Antonio Spurs with the 24th overall pick. He played for six teams in his eight-year NBA career.

Bilbo used to work with this Scott Pollard groupie

2011-07-29T10:34:00.000-07:00

Bilbo used to be the boss of the chick on the right. She apparently is now a Scott Pollard groupie. Sort of sad.

ESPY's NBA Video

2011-07-25T15:59:00.000-07:00

Hahahahaaaaaaa!!!

Just kidding.

Brandon Jennings

2011-07-21T16:48:00.000-07:00

Here is a little reminder that NBA Ballers are way better than anyone who was a JC All Star or someone who is "really good" in your men's league:

My stock tip of the day is HDY.
It's had a long trend these past few days with volume that's not out of the ordinary. And everyone needs 3D technology when searching for oil off the coast of West Africa. You can probably make a buck or so on it and if they find oil it'll go up even more.

Please do nothing I say, though. I cannot be held accountable for anything in life.

Kevin Durant has Tats

2011-07-21T16:23:00.000-07:00

Yep, even Mr. Wholesome Kevin The Kid Durantula has tattoos. But he only has tattoos where a jersey can cover them. That's what being business is all about. Thanks TBJ

"It's Business. It's Business Time!"

The Wire

2011-07-21T16:19:00.000-07:00

Thanks to The Basketball Jones for posting this video of East vs. West in Season 1 of The Wire:

That was the only time that Avon got played. Oh, I guess he also got played when he died. Silly Prop Joe.

The NBA is Boring Right Now

2011-07-18T12:18:00.000-07:00

With the players locked out things are very boring. Apart from Yao Ming and Shaq retiring, Shaq signing on at TNT to sit aside Chuck Barkley, and Sasha Vajychick playing in Turkey, there isn't anything interesting going on in our NBA world. Hence, there hasn't been consistent Nextians posts since the finals.

Therefore henceworth I'd like to transform the Nextians dot blogspot dot com blog to another focus and here are my ideas:

Let me know what you'd like to see. Thanks.

DJ Steve Porter: The Year of LeBron

2011-07-08T12:08:00.000-07:00

Rocking this one in my ipod and zune....for like a minute.

Tony Parker Vacations

2011-07-08T12:02:00.000-07:00

I'm outta here, Eva

With no Collective Bargaining Agreement, NBA players can do whatever they want. Tony Parker can go jetpacking in St. Tropez for $5000 and Coach Popovich can't say or do shit.

NBA Owner College Pictures

2011-07-08T10:46:00.000-07:00

Now that the lockout is on, Deron Williams is on a plane to play in Turkey, Kobe did a 360 dunk, and Steph Curry is about to get married let's have some Lockout Fun. Today's game is "Guess The NBA Owner By Looking at His College Pictures".

If you can't figure it out, head over to Barstool U for more photos.

Dallas Mavs '10/'11 Season on DVD

2011-06-28T17:11:00.001-07:00

Tons of classic music + player commentary + slow motion = EPIC

Warriors Draft

2011-06-24T15:52:00.000-07:00

Nextians have already heard about Klay Thompson sweet J, Jeremy Tyler's exploits overseas and Charles Jenkins rise at Hofstra. But have you seen these guys yet?

Charles Jenkins documentary:

Henry Abbott of TrueHoop hangs with Jenkins on Draft Day. Did you hear he doesn't have tattoos?

At the Portland pre-draft workout, Jeremy Tyler doesn't know who Nate McMillan is:

New Workout

2011-06-23T11:31:00.000-07:00

The P90X workout is so 2009. This year's hot new get in shape quick workout is sweeping the basketball nation. As future Lottery Pick (as in: later today) Bismack Biyombo shows us in his workout for the Bobcats, the "Dunk as Many Times as You Can" workout is sure to get any baller in shape.

Thanks to TBJ at The Score.

Like Dirk

2011-06-21T15:05:00.001-07:00

Be Like Dirk - watch more funny videos

The Undisputed Study of Dirk Nowitzki

2011-06-16T11:17:00.000-07:00

You must read THIS now.

Take some time, read all of the links, and know the truth. What a great article. I just had to post it as a post instead of twittering the link into the abyss.

The Business; Dirk vs. LeBron

2011-06-16T10:55:00.000-07:00

The hot chicks at Bloomberg have some interesting videos on the business side of Dirk Nowitzki and LeBron James. Just like their difference in play in the NBA Finals, the difference in they way they run their "brand" is striking.

First we have LeBrand and his new 25% equity ownership of Sheets Energy Strips, a breath strip that gives you energy. Maybe he could have popped 10 of these strips before the 4th Quarter:

Contrast that to Dirk, the agent-less, non-endorsement-seeking "I just want to play basketball" Finals MVP:

TrueHoop TV

2011-06-13T15:55:00.000-07:00

NBA Nerds have immediate post-game discussion. Abbott, Arnovitz, and Hollinger. 3x bald. 3x awesome.

Guess Who Said This?

2011-06-13T10:01:00.000-07:00

“All the people that was rooting on me to fail, at the end of the day they have to wake up tomorrow and have the same life that they had before they woke up today. They have the same personal problems they had today. I’m going to continue to live the way I want to live and continue to do the things that I want to do with me and my family and be happy with that.

“They can get a few days or a few months or whatever the case may be on being happy about not only myself, but the (Team Name) not accomplishing their goal. But they have to get back to the real world at some point.”

First correct answer gets a Dirk Nowitzki "How To Shoot Free Throws" DVD, NBA Final MVP Special Edition.

Dallas Mavericks Motivational Video

2011-06-10T15:34:00.000-07:00

Mavs Head Coach Rick Carlisle is planning on showing this video to his team a few hours before Game 6 on Sunday:

And from the YouTube comments section: "If you give LeBron a dollar and asked for change, he'd only give you 75 cents back. That's because he doesn't have a 4th Quarter".

2011 NBA Finals Game 5 Roundup

2011-06-10T12:45:00.000-07:00

I've mentioned The Basketball Karma Gods before in this here web log and have found it to be a pretty good indicator of future results. Most recently I said that Russell Westbrook's bitchyness would lead to a Thunder loss in the WCF and Carlos Boozer's rap would to lead to a Bulls loss in the ECF. Both Karma reads were correct.

I can't say that I knew about the now popular "LeBron and Wade Feigning Dirk Illness After Thursday Morning's pre-Game Shoot Around" before Game 5 tipped but when I saw it during the telecast I knew that it wasn't good for The Heat. The above video shows two Superstars making a dumb joke in the middle of the NBA Finals with the Series tied 2-2. BronWade are either:

1) using comedy to calm their nerves about a very important Game 5 later in the day
2) just being jerks and not focusing on Game 5 later in the day

Something tells me that Dirk hasn't thought or smiled at a joke since the playoffs began. I know that South Park has ruled that Germans are the most unfunny people in the world but I know I've seen Dirk joke around before and I know he will smile on the court. Just not in these playoffs. Steely-eyed unwavering determination (or maybe he's just still sick).

After re-watching the above video 9 times, I'm pretty certain that the answer on BronWade's joke is answer 2. The Larry O'Brien trophy isn't the main focus of their lives right now as basketball players in their absolute primes. They focus more or global icon status, sweet parties in South Beach, million dollar sponsorships and, of course, chicks. And this is why the Basketball Karma gods struck them down in Game 5.

Fellow Theta Chi Alum from The University of Purdue Brian Cardinal did his job filling in for Peja by throwing his body everywhere (therapusa chier, brother). T'was fun to watch! An attempted charge on Wade led to something called a "contusion" which I'm sure is just a smart word for "a bad bruise". This forced Wade to sit out many minutes of Game 5....which may have actually been a good thing, according to StatGeeks, since BronWadeBosh were a -14 last night when on the floor together. But it's tough to argue that Wade's absence didn't hurt the psyche of the Heat.

In LeBron's case I was thinking that he would come out in Game 5 with fury in an all out assault mode to prove "The Haters" wrong. He did notch a trip-dub becoming the 5th player in the last 25 years to attain this in a Finals loss. But Karma bit LeBron as well when it came to the 4th Quarter even though he tweeted "It's Now or Never" on the twatter:

Let's provide the trusty 4th Quarter comparison of Lebron v. Dirk in the Finals through Game 5:
          James            Nowitzki
Points:    11                    52
FG:        4/16                13/27
FT:       3/3                 27/27
REB:      10                    15

Heck, even Jason Terry (with LBJ guarding him) has outscored LeBron 16-2 in the 4th Quarter of Games 4 and 5.

Karma most definitely caught up with the Heat. This is the logical conclusion, right? Speaking of logic, wasn't the world supposed to come to an end a few weeks back? I digress.

Game 5 was entertaining as all heck. Even Jeff Van Gundy called it "the best Finals game I've ever seen!!" which might be a bit of a stretch. The teams finally broke out of their offensive funks/getting dominated by awesome defense. Dirk scored 29 but it was really the small kids who made it happen for the Mavs. As TrueHoop points out:

"Jason Terry (21 points), JJ Barea (17) and Jason Kidd (13) each set series highs in points. According to Elias the trio of guards became the first set of teammates to each have 10 points, five assists and three 3-pointers in an NBA Finals game."

With 4:37 left in the game, the Mavs were down 4. They ended on a 17-4 run. The Mavs celebrated after their 3 point makes, much like the Heat prematurely celebrated in a Game 2 loss, and the craziest game of this Finals was in the books.

We are watching a superior team (Heat) lose to a pretty dang good team (Mavs). If the Heat can turn it on in Miami, they can still win the 'ship despite imperfect execution all throughout the season and the playoffs. Part of me wants them to figure it out and win in spite of themselves. But 98% of me loves the Mavs, their run, and the Dirk redemption tour of 2011. I can't wait for the articles that say "if the Mavs lose Game 6 it's over". Can't wait for Sunday.

Weekly Chat; Game 4 NBA Finals

2011-06-09T16:38:00.000-07:00

Bilbo is a party animal

Cam looks A LOT like Mark Cuban

Maaatt decides to start off the Weekly chat with a question posed to fellow Nextians Bilbo and Cam: I don't get what Lebron is doing. His lack of hustle last game was so obvious in clips. That last drive he was one foot away from Dirk's drive and didn't even move a muscle to help out, WTF? Is it his ego? Is Wade tearing it up, so he get his feelings hurt that he's not the best player on the team? Or is is just super tired from the reg season and playing all playoffs? Is it a possibility he has totally gassed? Is Eddie House secretly screwing his mom AND Bibby's sister???

Cam: When LeBron scores 15 points or less in a playoff game, his teams are 0-7. Fascinating.

What’s even more fascinating is that LeBron has scored less than 15 points in a playoff game 7 times. 7 TIMES. He is the best player in this league, hands down, but he’s got some sort of mental problem.

Jordan never did this, was a complete killer, and has never been passive his entire life. During Jordan’s rookie season he bought a PacMan machine for his house because he was determined to be the best PacMan player on the Bulls. LeBron’s more about being a global icon and illegally recruiting college players to sign to his stupid agency. Hey LeBron, why don’t you develop a post game this summer instead, mmmkay? Either that or at least try to become a killer like you were in the Bulls series. Which brings up the point:

Wade and LeBron currently can’t both be awesome at the same time. It’s one guys’ stage or the others’. Chicago Series = LeBron dominate and Wade plays like crap. Finals = Wade plays incredible and LeBron is passive. Do you think they talk about this before a series starts or do they just figure it out after game 1 and go from there?

They’ll probably still win the ‘ship this way but it is quite strange.

Bilbo: What if LeBron is playing bad on purpose so he can explode in the last couple of games? Yeah right! The Jordan comparisons need to stop. They are different players completely. A better comparison is Magic, except that even fun time Magic had a switch that turned him into a beast. Maybe LeBron didn’t come with that switch, ya dig? Maybe he isn’t the player we want him to be and never will be. He wants to focus on his brand, fine. Global icon? Sure, why not. But he needs to know that craving the spotlight comes with a cost, namely, that anything less than incredible on the way to a title is a failure. Anything less than superhuman plays night in and night out on this stage is unacceptable. Maybe the best comparison should be Wilt Chamberlain. He too had all the physical tools but could never take that next step to greatness. I think he ended up with one title when he prolly should have had 4-5.

That being said, it would not surprise me to see he take over game 5. That is, if D-Wade will let him.

I’m still sticking to Dallas in 6.

Cam: It's hard to stop the Jordan comparisons. Especially when Scotty Pippen just said that LBJ was better than Jordan. Aside from Scotty being a dick, check out LBJ's downward trending usage rate:

Dwyane Wade vs LeBron James
Usage Rate, 2010-11 Season

	Wade	James
Reg. Season	28.8	29.6
First 3 Rds	26.8	25.6
NBA Finals	26.5	19.4

Pre-NBA Finals Get Your Mind Right Music: Bon Iver

2011-06-09T12:44:00.000-07:00

Crunch Time: Dirk vs. LeBron in the 4th Quarter

2011-06-09T10:05:00.000-07:00

Tale of the Dominating Performance vs. the Disappearing Act. Stats through Game 4 of the NBA Finals:

Dirk Nowitzki vs LeBron James
4th Quarter This Series

	Nowitzki	James
FG	12-24	3-12
FT	18-18	3-3
Reb	14	7
Pts	44	9

Thanks to TrueHoop

Mark Jackson; Warriors Head Coach

2011-06-07T17:17:00.000-07:00

New Warriors Advanced Statistics Guy

The boo birds are all over the internets today regarding the hiring of Mark "I've Never Coached Before" Jackson. But before we get into it too much, let's throw out some randumb Mark Jackson facts via Wikipedia:

Did you know that Mark Jackson's brother was the 500 lb baller Escalade of the And 1 Tour? RIP Escalade.
Did you know that there's a rule named after Mark Jackson? Just Google "Mark Jackson Rule" and be amazed.
Did you know that Mark Jackson is half Dominican? That's pretty cool.
Did you know that Mark Jackson played at St. Johns with Chris Mullin? There's some Dubs ties right there.
Did you know that Mark Jackson played for 5 Hall of Fame coaches during his playing career (Lou Carnesecca, Lenny Wilkens, Jerry Sloan, Pat Riley and Larry Brown). Me neither.
Doesn't Mark Jackson look a lot like Doc Rivers?
I can't wait for Warrior Fans to start tracking the Jackson-isms that he spits out at press conferences throughout his tenure.

I know Jackson is annoying in the announcer’s chair. But when you listen to other coaches during the broadcasts in the huddles and locker room, these guys aren’t geniuses. This tells me that it doesn’t take a whole lot of brain power to communicate to these guys. Heck, Phil Jackson dumbed it down to the Nth degree when trying to get Lamar Odumb to catch a sugar high and play well. Only Doc seems to successfully speak on a high level to his squad as evident in the awesome “The Association” series.

Going from a coach who made one shot while at Indiana to one who made 14 playoffs during his playing days is a huge upgrade. Players respect coaches who have experience in The Association and Jackson has plenty of it. Heck, all the players probably think he’s great as an announcer, too.

Lacob "only" gave him $2mil/year for 3 years which had to factor into it (Nellie was making $6mil/year). Since this is his first gig Lacob was able to pay him accordingly.

Read the Tim Kawakami blog which has a transcript of Jerry West. West seems to like Jackson…a lot. That same blog talks a lot about Mike Malone who is going to join Jackson GSW as an assistant. Malone was on Monty William’s staff in NOLA and is some sort of defensive guru a-la Tom Thibodeau and helped the Chris Paul’s become one of the best defensive teams in the league. West was fired up about getting this guy. Plus, Malone provides a good option if Mark Jackson ever requires canning.

Warriors GM Larry Riley did say that "he's going to have some real strengths in communicating with players" and this seems to be a very strong theme of Lacob's hires: Bob Meyers was a successful agent before becoming Assistant GM, Jerry West is the frigging logo, and now Mark Jackson who is probably friendly with 90% of the players that actually matter in The Association.

Now let's look at the other options The Warriors had. I don’t like JVG. He only cares about defense and slowing the game down limiting possessions. The Knicks and Rockets of the past were turrible to watch even though they won. He wouldn’t have fit the ID of the Dubs and even if he was hired and changed them around to be defensive focused, it would have sucked kinda.

And I’m still laughing that the Lakers got Mike Brown. This dude is such a scapegoat and I'm not sure it is possible to wipe the Cleveland stink off of him. I can't wait to see how him and Kobe get along.

Some people out there would have preferred San Antonio Assistant Tom Budenholzer or Mavs Assistant Dwane Casey. Or perhaps Lawrence Frank. The line of tried-and-failed coaches on Association Team benches is large.

The Warriors now have a direction, a focus. It's on personality, being direct with the fans and media, and it's on defense. This defensive focus points to the Monta being shipped out for a true SG defensive stopper in Iggy being a possibility. I’m not sure if I like that trade (because Iguodola speaks with a lisp) but I wouldn’t be pissed if it went down. But the Sixers are being sold currently so this may hold up the potential swap.

Anyway, Warriors dot com has some solid audio and video HERE

Momma, There Goes That Man!

2011-06-07T09:53:00.000-07:00

Notes on Grand Master Lacob's signing of "Hand Down Man Down" Mark Jackson as the new Warriors Head Coach:

Cam Inman of The Oakland Tribune: "This is a familiar storyline to the Bay Area, and a recent one, too: A franchise stuck in a playoff drought just hired a first-time coach who happens to be a former player and licensed minister. Let's hope Mark Jackson doesn't bomb like Mike Singletary did in a 49ers tenure that goot extinguished before he could finish out the 2010 season. By reaching the playoffs in 14 of his 17 seasons as a player, Jackson obviously has ambitious goals for a franchise routinely absent from the postseason. ... Phil Jackson might have been a more convincing -- albeit unattainable -- choice considering his ring collection. But Mark Jackson's selection should bring energy and renewed interest to one of the league's most loyal fan bases."
Ailene Voisin of The Sacramento Bee: "The Warriors' hiring of Mark Jackson a few hours ago caught most Bay Area types by surprise. The sense was that the process would drag on for another week or so, with owner Joe Lacob waiting to speak with Dallas Mavericks assistant Dwane Casey after the NBA Finals. But Lacob just seems to love the drama. He loves the surprises. (See his hiring of Jerry West as a consultant). Whether he has a clue about successfully running an NBA franchise is another matter. This is a risky hiring, to say the least. ... Jackson's hiring surely seems to further the notion that the Warriors plan to bust up the undersized backcourt of Stephen Curry and Monta Ellis. It doesn't work and was never going to work. Ellis, who was skeptical from the start, was only telling it like it was. And is. Serious trade talks to continue."
Tim Kawakami of the San Jose Mercury News: "As a coach, strategist and day-to-day manager of an often rocky locker room, broadcaster Mark Jackson is a total blank slate, an unknown, a great leap of faith. He has zero high-level coaching experience, so Jackson is a giant sideline question mark, in capital letters and triplicate. But the Warriors, it is clear, were not exactly aiming for any of those specific things when they surprisingly hired Jackson as their coach Monday. Co-owner Joe Lacob was going for something else, something less tangible and something a lot riskier: Headline-making, room-dominating personality. 'You want to have a guy who's strong enough to be in charge,' general manager Larry Riley said Monday night. 'Mark has a strong personality -- not abrasive, but he has a strong personality and should have the right mix to be able to lead our team.' Yes, even the Warriors have to couch this hiring with words such as 'should have' and 'we think,' because Jackson has a long career as a player and now offbeat announcer, but no track record as the boss. Nobody knows what kind of offense he will run, what kind of players he will lean on (other than the point guard) and how he will deal with the daily grind of the media and the like. ... The Warriors aren't an easy team to coach, and Lacob thinks a strong dose of attitude and confidence can overcome a complete lack of most other qualifying traits. It's a risk. Not a small one. When Lacob says he is willing to take them, he isn't kidding. It's just his personality."

Gracias to True Hoop for compiling the quotes in Tuesday's First Cup.

The Weekly Chat: NBA Finals Game 2

2011-06-03T17:50:00.000-07:00

Cam: wow, what a game 2 in the NBA Finals. In the 4^th Quarter, the Heat go on a 13-0 run to get up by 15 with about 6:20 left in the game after Bosh jams in the putback against the Mav’s small lineup. Carlisle immediately calls time out and puts Chandler back in. The music is bumping in Heat’s American Airlines Arena, the fan noise is being blared through the speakers, about 25% of the fans are standing up and politely clapping….it was a mildly amused fanbase dressed in all-white

On a very lengthy side note: have you noticed that there are hundreds of all-white t-shirts in American Airlines Arena after the game? Do the fans not care to take the Finals souvenir home? Or are they so small brained that they think that they have to take off their free shirt and leave it at the arena? Why isn’t there some kid who runs through the seats and collects them all selling them on e-Bay? Is there not a market for the all-white Heat finals t-shirt? On the other hand, did you notice how full the Dallas version of American Airlines Arena was? Yes, both Miami and Dallas’ arena’s are called “American Airlines Arena”. How stoked is American Airlines? http://www.nba.com/2011/news/05/29/arena-names.ap/index.html Those Dallas fans watching on the big screen were pumped. If Dallas hands out free t-shirts at Sunday’s game, I bet we will not spot one lone Finals t-shirt while watching the post game report in their arena.

But then, boom! The Mavs go nuts. Dirk scores the last 9 and the Mavs close on a 22-5 run to win it. They were so clutch, especially on defense. I can go on but I think you probably want to blogger something by this point.

ThrillsToTha…: I noticed a lot of the people in the front rows were wearing white, but not the free T’s. It was like one of those racist “Wear White Parties” you see in the big city. Kind of like this:

They're on a boat. Take a good hard look, cuz they're sailing on a boat.

I think these guys were at Oracle back in 2007 when they opened up the arena for the first round road games against Dallas.

Anyway, I thought the Mavs played mediocre through the first 3.5 quarters. Bad passing by Kidd, poor shooting from Dirk and zero help defense from Chandler. The Heat had so many wide open dunks they can’t even make posters out of them. No defenders were even in frame! But surprisingly they hung in there until the fourth when the Heat “went off”. After D-Wade sunk his corner 3 and celebrated with LeBron, I almost turned off the game in disgust. I couldn’t believe the Mavs were f’in up so bad. But I’m glad I didn’t change the channel. It was a remarkable comeback that very well swung the entire series in the Mavs favor.

Cam: Fastbreak dunks and putback slams, even when they’re done while the ball is still inside the cylinder, only count as two points. Blocks at the rim my Mr. Canada Joel Anthony still only count as a missed shot. At least that’s the way the Mavs react to these things. No matter how loud the Miami sound editor turned up the canned crowd noise, they went about their business. The Mavs were getting to the line (boring) shooting pretty well (boring) and out rebounding (boring) the Heat through the first 3 quarters. I don’t think that they were playing badly, just boring. The Heat were playing more exciting, yes, but they weren’t playing any better.

And then the 4^th quarter hit. The Heat went nuts putting on their big run. The Heat make these runs all the time, yes. But lately it has been at the end of games to win. This time, though, they made their run a little too early. With 7 minutes and change left, Wade hit the three pointer infront of the Mavs bench. He held his follow through for a little too long, posing as Carlisle called that time out. LeBron wanted to get in on the love and started punching him in the chest. The celebration was on. And this fired up the Mavs beyond belief. The Mavs have gone on a few huge runs themselves these playoffs. 16 down vs. the Lakers. 12 down vs. the Thunderkittens. And 15 down last night.

I’m not sure how this will play out. If Terry keeps losing his man and missing J’s, it’s going to be tough to win. If Peja or JJ can’t catch fire for a game and propel them to a win, I’m not sure the Mavs can do this. The Heat will just continuing being the Heat. They will go on runs, they will dunk and posterize the Mavs players, they will block shots, and they’ll miss free throws. They’ll have stupid possessions where LeBron or Wade dribble around until there’s 3 seconds left on the shot clock and then chuck a three. The only thing I know is that this series is all on Dallas’ shoulders. If they play great, they can win this thing. If they play just good or worse, Miami will be Miami and the bad guys will win their ring.

Warriors Ownership is getting REAL

2011-05-23T15:56:00.000-07:00

Lonely Island

2011-05-23T12:39:00.000-07:00

Here on THE Nextians, we love The Lonely Island. It is our official music of The NBA Playoffs.
(GirlTalk is the official music of THE Nextians regular season)

Why The Bulls Won't Win

2011-05-22T10:45:00.000-07:00

Playing your Karma Kards right is important to winning. Former Warrior Owner Chris Cohan constantly messed with the Karma of the franchise and look at the hole the new ownership has got to climb their selves out of.

The basketball Karma gods tend to focus on the small things. Russell Westbrook's constant scowl and frazzled attitude will most likely dismantle the Thunder's hopes to beat the Mavericks in the WCF, for example.

The Karma gods haven't struck down the Heat and probably won't. They most likely understand why LBJ left Cleveland and appreciate the effort him and his Heat teammates are giving in the ECF.

So this song with Twista by Carlos Boozer is frightening. First of all, he calls it the Bulls "Anthem". I wonder how Jerry Krause feels about that? Boozer also secured the services of a PA announcer introducing which dude is singing. Wow. CHECK IT OUT

Something tells me that the Karma gods won't take this over confident pile of garbage lightly. Especially since Boozer is so bad at rapping/hip hopping. I wish this wasn't the case, but I'm pretty sure the Heat will take out the Bulls in the ECF. And that is painful to say.

What do the Thunder, Heatles and Bulls have in common?

2011-05-20T10:54:00.000-07:00

D-Rose by Free Darko

There is a common thread between the Thunder, the Heat and the Bulls this playoffs. They are successful teams with ball dominators where assisting teammates is secondary to getting one's own shot. The anti hand check rules of 2004 have made it easier for perimeter players penetrate the defense and score off the dribble or get fouled and score from the line. ESPN's Dean Oliver breaks down the revealing "points per assist" measure in world famous TrueHoop blog:

Both Henry Abbott and John Hollinger have written about Westbrook’s shoot-first mentality, but there's an interesting statistical story brewing that they didn’t capture. Oklahoma City led the NBA in total points scored per assist, with 5.23 points per assist. (It was 8.31 in Game 4.) This measure isn’t talked about much, but it is a reflection of teams that get their points off the dribble and at the foul line, not off a lot of kick-outs to shooters or dishes to big men around the basket.

The Thunder’s high value reflects a more individual and athletic game, something that is fair to say about how the Thunder play over good amounts of time. Not surprisingly, the star-driven system of the Miami Heat came in second in this metric during the regular season. Both teams use their athleticism off the dribble to drive to the middle and get foul calls.

Can you guess who is at the bottom of the list? The Celtics and Dallas Mavericks, two of the oldest teams in the league.

Many will argue that the "Me First" 90's Association was difficult to watch at times. There was a lot of "give ~~Iverson~~ a playmaker the ball, clear out, and watch him go to work". The recent NBA Renaissance we are enjoying now came about when highly skilled and likable players committed to their teammates and played the game the way "it was supposed to be played" while not getting into too many shenanigans off court.

This brings me back to the 2004 anti hand check rule again. Retrospectively, this is seen as a good thing because it promotes fan-friendly offense. Gone are the days of the defensive player legally landing forearm shivers on the ball handler preventing him from getting into the lane (it's amazing that Jordan did what he did in the world of legal hand checking). Because of this, the new generation of insanely athletic and incredibly strong ball handlers has thrived. LeBron, Wade, Derrick Rose and Westbrook all utilize their skill/strength combo to get the job done off the dribble. And something tells me that at least one of these teams will be in the NBA Finals this year. This obviously isn't too difficult of a prediction to make.

Ask yourself what style of basketball have you truly enjoyed watching this post season?

The Heat are awesome in the open court but it's annoying to watch either LeBron or Wade not play off of each other more. They do a lot of "OK, it's you're turn" and don't seem to play like a team for a good portion of the game. The argument for LeBron and Wade playing this way is that they don't really have anyone else on their team.

Although I appreciate the amazing plays that Association MVP Derrick Rose can make while driving to the basket, I fault him for not fulfilling his PG duties and getting Boozer in a position to score 15 to 20 points a game (he's currently score 10.7 in 30 minutes this post season) let alone shoot just 41% from the field. Without getting a confident and effective second offensive option involved I doubt that the Bulls will be able to take the title this year.

Russell Westbrook is having many articles written about his 40.6% from the field this playoffs while taking 22.11 attempts per game, a total of 12 more attempts through 9 games than super duper star Kevin Durant who's shooting 46.5%. It's almost like he is in a battle to declare his #1 option supremacy instead of just trying to win the game. The Dwight Howard-esq frustration on his face seems to be bubbling up inside and there doesn't seem to be any change in his style this post season.

With all of these guys, you know when the ISO set is coming and the "10 dribble-drive-pull up-shoot" sequence is coming. You can just see it in their body language. And it is my assertion that this type of basketball is not that fun to watch unless the only reason you watch is to catch the truly amazing play a few times per night.

Because of this I find myself gravitating towards rooting for the Grizzlies and their big man/any man approach. For the Celtics and their Sebastian Pruiti approved offensive plays. I even root for the Hawks while wondering if Josh Smiff is finally going to understand how awesome he could be if he just shot 5 feet from the hoop and stopped playing ISO (as he did in Game 4 vs. the Bulls). I loved pulling for the Mavericks and their great ball movement leading to some sort of post season 3 point record sparked by Jason Terry and Peja Stojakovic just waiting on the weak side for their teammates to rotate the ball to them. It honestly had nothing to do with beating the Lakers. Well, maybe that's not entirely true.

Although Westbrook and Rose are obviously The Now and The Next of our beloved Association, I hope that they either figure out how to balance their games more or I will just naturally gravitate towards not being much of a fan of their boring ball stopping yet sometimes flashy ESPN Highlight worthy play.

Russell Westbrook is Mad, Sad, then Happy

2011-05-20T10:49:00.000-07:00

Guys with large egos make these types of poses

I won't do the normal blogger thing and call him the "C" word rhyming with "lazy" but Westbrook appears to be a little, how do you say, immature? Up and down emotionally? Not really one of the leaders of his team even though he's it's All Star Point Guard? It seems to me that you really shouldn't be getting pissed about being taken out of a game with a few seconds left in the third quarter and then having people calm you down for the next half hour.

From The Oklahoman:
"Oklahoma City Thunder point guard Russell Westbrook had an animated reaction when pulled from Game 2 with :28 remaining in the third quarter against the Dallas Mavericks on Thursday night. Westbrook did not play again and the reserve Eric Maynor finished out the Thunder's 106-100 victory inside American Airlines Center. Westbrook initially had an exchange with assistant coach Mark Bryant and fellow assistant Maurice Cheeks came over and had a heart-to-heart with the All-Star reserve. Thunder center Kendrick Perkins also took the 22-year-old Westbrook aside during the game and shared some encouragement. 'I had to let him know we're winning, everything's going good,' Perkins said. 'I think he's fine. I told him, 'Different guys will help at different times.' ' After the game ended, Westbrook was spotted dancing down the tunnel on the way back to the locker room."

This kid has come a long way from being a no-minute-getter as a UCLA Freshman, to being a lottery pick after his Sophomore year, to being an All-Star point guard in his third year in the Association. He has amazing gifts. But the Thunder will never reach their full potential without this guy eventually "getting it". Benching him for the entire 4th Quarter was indeed a bold move by Thunder Coach Scotty Brooks, but it was the right one considering the way he was acting.

Hey, look at that! A Thunder post without mentioning Kevin Durant!

Down 0-2, Make It Interesting

2011-05-07T09:35:00.000-07:00

The Good Ole' Days

As of this moment in time, both the Boston Celtics and Los Angeles Lakers are down 0-2 in their respective series. Both teams are up there in age (except for Bynum and Rondo), are not playing well, and we may be witnessing an official changing of the guard in The Association. I decided to pose a question to my fellow Nextians:

Who has a better chance to make their series interesting? The Celtics or the Lakers? Here is what these genius' said.

Of course, the trusty Bilbo "Burglar" Baggins chimed in first:
I hate betting against The Lakers, but I think they will drop Game 3 w/o Ron Ron. Unless Gasol and Odom have epic games, I find it hard to believe they will win in Dallas. Boston has a much better chance of winning at home, despite looking like they just woke up from a nap. Rondo needs to take advantage of the fact that Bibby is guarding him and
I could see LeBron settling for jumpers with Shaq filling the paint. He isn't the defensive stopper he once was, but he can still take up space and deliver hard fouls.

Overall I don't like either team's chances, but if the question is which team will make the series more interesting (not a sweep) than I'll go with Boston.

Bilbo Baggins
2x YeeBA Champion

Timmay (Czar of the MVM) decided to respond:
Bilbo...your signature is weak. The Lakers are the champs until proven otherwise. The Mavs, well...they are the Mavs and were the last team to take the first 2 on the road in a best of 7 and lose the series. Go Celtics...win game 3!

BK kept it short and sweet, trying to wrap up his week at work:

Lakers. I think the heat are a better team than the mavs

Toomie (MVM) kept it even shorter as he had a tee time after work:
Celtics

Timmay (MVM Czar) then made it all about betting:
I would love to say the Celtics because I put $100 on them to win the series, but I think age is catching up to them. Their entire team is injured. I hate the Lakers, but if they win Game 3, they are right back in it.

BK then responded a day later:
Can I take back my answer about the Lakers? I haven't watch Boston play too much this year but I get the sense they are old and the Heat are just hungrier. Its all about the matchups, I think everything is setting up to be the Heat's year and LeBron isn't going to back down.

Well, it seems to me as if "getting old" is a pervasive theme amongst THE Nextians who had time to respond on a Friday afternoon. Although I do not agree and wonder if these guys actually watch the games, we all agree that this is the end of an era.

The "Weekly" Chat -- 2nd Round Playoffs Edition

2011-05-05T17:00:00.000-07:00

Cam: Hello Jamesbo/Thrilly-B. I’m sure you are enjoying the heck out of this here second round. It certainly is "Fan"tastic! Aside from those nightmare inducing talking basketball commercials and the T-Mobile rapping Emo dude, what is intriguing you at the moment about the actual playing of basketball? Both Dallas victories in Staples were something to behold. Kobe hasn't yet been able to produce his patented "Badger" playoff scowl. Dirk dominates Game 1's close and the Mavs just out execute the defending chumps in Game 2. Dirk doesn’t look too soft now, does he?

Biblo: I have learned over the years to never write off The Lakers after a Game 1 loss. But it is hard to ignore the fact that Pau Gasol is so crucial to their success that anything other than spectacular play from him will spell disaster for the reigning champs. With so much talent on each side, I think whoever makes fewer mistakes will win. The Lakers looked tuuuurrable the last 2 minutes of Game 1. Stupid fouls and turnovers against a solid veteran team like the Mavs is suicide. However, I have to think The Lakers will bounce back. This series is tough to call, but I give an edge to the team that has made it to The Finals 3 years in a row. Lakers in 7.

Nice "distressed" jeans, Mark. Also, nice team. Seriously.

Cam: I think you'll change your tune especially when you learn that Dallas won game two as well in Staples. Did your TiVo miss that one? Also, congrats on making it through a post concerning the Lakers without mentioning Kobe. And enjoy the Artest clothesline on JJ Barea = one game suspension. I also love the fact that you're making series' predictions even though I didn't ask for them. Way to take some initiative, Burglar Baggins.

Cam: The Grizz looked great in game 1 but then Durant held a team dinner serving James Harden and Eric Maynor some of KD Kool Aid and these two 2^nd teamers combined to drop 36 in game 2. Lithium was also added to Westbrook’s fruit punch causing him to thankfully only shoot 20 times instead of 30 thereby leading to a more efficient Thunder attack.

Bilbo: Memphis is a fun team to root for, and I’d love to see a possible Gasol vs Gasol match up in the next round, but I have my doubts that a team that relies so heavily on Zach Randolph so much can ever make it to the WCF. I just can’t see them getting past such a talented team like OKC. If Ibaka is seriously hurt, that obviously changes things, but getting past an aging Spurs team is one thing (Attn: Laker fans..this is your team in 3 years!), but getting past Durant and Co. when they are clicking is too difficult as was evident in Game 2. This series will come to who controls the paint. If Thunder can hold their own, their offense will tip the series in their favor. OKC in 6.

Pau is sad that Marc is now better

Cam: And how old and slow do them Celtics look? Wade & Co. seem to just be playing harder and faster. As the Sportsdouche and Brian Windhorst said, this is Wade's team now as all LeBron is good for is setting hard picks (hilarious). Boston just can't seem to get over the Perkin's trade and the things that they used to do well (playing harder and tougher) aren't happening.

Bilbo: I’m pissed off at The Celtics. I really expected a tough, physical series between these two squads, and so far the only beef was from Paul Pierce, the least intimidating player in the NBA. I’m sure they really miss Perkins right now, because he would have knocked down D-Wade at least once a game. Who would of thought that it was him and not Garnett who defined the Celtics as a tough as nails team? They just haven’t been the same since the trade and I can’t see getting back on track against Los Tres Culos. Speaking of the Heat, I don’t think they’ve had to break a sweat at all through the first 2 rounds. Do we have to wait until the next round for Thibodeau to attack their weaknesses? Of course the way Chicago is playing I think The Heat could sleepwalk through the The East and face the winner of the Lakers/OKC series. While I wish this would go 7, I’m picking the Heat in 5.

Cam: I'm finding it hard to enjoy the Bulls right now. D-Rose isn't shooting the ball well and it seems as if they aren't playing to their full potential. Although I think they'll get by the Hawks after ATL stealing Game 1 in Chi-town, they better be ready for 'dem Heat when they get through this series. Thibbs might find a way to slow down Wade n' Co. but if they don't tighten up their offense (paging: Carlos Boozer) then they are going to have trouble hanging with Mike Miller and his teammates.

Bilbo: How about them Hawks?? The perennial underachievers are suddenly a scary team. The talent has been there but consistency has always been lacking. I wasn’t sure if their round 1 victory was more The Magic playing crappy or if this team was legit. After the Game 1 beat down against The Jordans, it’s hard not to take them seriously. I feel like Chicago will come out on top, but it always looks like Derrick Rose is one drive away from a serious injury. But I’ll stick with the new NBA darling and say the Bulls in 6.

Cam: I like all of your predictions but the Lakers one. Of course, you wrote your thoughts before their Game 2 loss so I'll cut you some slack. But if you had to say, who was the hottest actress sitting in the front row at Staples?

Celtics GM Danny Ainge Is Stunned

2011-05-04T10:34:00.000-07:00

I love this picture to no end. The Heatles are playing tough and with athleticism. The Celtics are playing detached, whiny, and sloppy. All the while Celtics GM Danny Ainge is coming to realize that he made the worst trade deadline move for a contending team in the history of the Association. This look? Priceless.

Thanks to Deadspin for finding this HD Quality screenshot somewhere on the internets.

Paul Pierce Gets Tossed

2011-05-02T13:16:00.000-07:00

PP was just plain mad. His Celtics didn't come out to play the Heatles in Game 1 and frustration does eventually boil over to where you lean extra hard into a screen on Dwyane Wade. Going 6-14 from the field for 19 points and 4 turnovers won't get the job done either. After Pierce took off he avoided speaking to the press (doesn't he get fined for that?) and Boston Globe writer Dan Shaughnessy calls him out:

"We thought we were over this stuff with Pierce. He is 33 years old. He’s been in the NBA since 1998. He was MVP of the Finals in 2008, for gosh sakes. What’s the excuse for losing his cool twice in the fourth quarter of a game against a team that’s always waiting to choke if you can keep things close?"

Get in your wheelchair to regain your powers and see you in Game 2, Truth.

2011 Grizzlies vs. 2007 Warriors

2011-04-27T12:14:00.000-07:00

Leave it to Bethlehem Shoals to write a diatribe comparing the 2011 Grizzlies and their 3-1 lead as an 8 seed over the 1 seed Spurs to the 2007 We Believe Warriors dismantling of the Mavs. Essentially, the Grizz are closing the book on the Duncan 4-ring dynasty and no one sees anything other than a 4-1 victory.

PEEP THIS RIGHT HERE

Shoals (RIP Free Darko) makes the point that these 8 seeds have very little in common. Although he did forget to mention that the 2007 Dubs went on a season ending win streak and won on the last day of the regular season to make the playoffs while the Grizz intentionally lost their last two games so that they could match up against the Spurs. But I'll give him the benefit of the doubt because he is awesome.

The Kings

2011-04-26T13:23:00.000-07:00

Many of my Nextians went to UC Davis and became Kings Fans even though they weren't from the Sacramento area. This was back in the days where Tivo didn't exist and the internet was used as an email machine and to download pictures of, well, you know what I'm talking about. We couldn't watch our home team on TV or follow them on the internet. For those of us from the Yay Yera, Warriors vs. Kings matchups were some of the most fun we had in front of the TV in college (aside from the OJ Trial, first season of South Park, last season of Seinfeld). We'd sit in the Segundo Dorms or Arlington Farms Apartments with cheep beer and and watch Kings games with a passion. My Sophomore year roommate even worked for the Kings pushing a button courtside that revolved the on-court advertisement panel. He loved being there even though the job paid him $5.50 an hour which he spent most of in gas money just to get there and back. The 2002 team was an incredible ride and much of our Laker hatred stems from Horry's 3 pointer and the official's screwing the Kings out of Game 6. And even though most of us are in the Bay Area and can now be more committed Warriors fans, the Kings still have a place in all of our hearts. They essentially were our college team.

I was trying to formulate some ideas on everything that's going on in Czar Stern's office, with the Maloof's relocation push, with Mayor Kevin Johnson's attempts to keep the Kings, with local Sacramento businesses promising more advertising money, and most importantly with the fans. It was difficult to figure it all out. All I know is that Sacramento really cares about their team. Like they care as much about it as the Seattle Supersonics fans did about their hijacked franchise.

But then Sportsguy Bill Simmons wrote a great piece (finally!) on the Maloofs and said everything I didn't have the time or skill to compile. It's not about DumbMarcus Cousins or Tyreke Evans or the inflated Beno Udrich salary. It's about how the owners are trying to screw the city of Sacramento and are hopefully not going to be successful. It's about Czar Stern and his pandering to the owners of a franchise while giving a far less shit about the fanbase. It's exposing the truth to what is wrong in the NBA today. Taking a loan from the city of Sacramento and then trying to get Anaheim to pay your relocation fees while you haven't even bothered to pay back your loan to the city you're trying to abandon? At the risk of sounding angry, I will never set foot in the Palms Casino and their new billion dollar tower again.

YeeBA Champion Interview: Bilbo Burgular Baggins

2011-04-26T11:18:00.000-07:00

Many of you know him as Bilbo Baggins, my sidekick on the NBA Weekly Chat where he disses and dishes on all things Association. But he is also known as "James". James is the guy who puts his nose to the computer screen and fancies himself a Fantasy Sports savant. After so many years of not winning a legitimate Fantasy Sport, James has reeled off back-to-back championships in the YeeBA. As if a title defense wasn't a good enough story, the way he won this year was nothing sort of EPIC. Or perhaps I should say "amazing" since we are speaking about The Association and all. Here is how he did it, in chat form of course.

Cam: James, congratulations on winning the YeeBA for the second straight year! It’s funny that last year’s victory was your first real fantasy sports title of your 128 years (editor’s note: he’s a hobbit) and you promptly came out and defended your title this year. That’s some big shit!

Biblo used his winnings to purchase a snowmobile

James/Bilbo: Wait a minute, are you saying that my 2008 Fantasy Golf Championship wasn’t real? Is golf not a legitimate sport?

Cam: Winning a 4 man PGA Golf League is not "legitimate". Back to the title at hand: Commish Toomie’s changing of the format from Rotisserie to Head to Head couldn’t stop you. Can you tell me about your thoughts pre-draft?

James/Bilbo: First of all, I was extremely lucky to win this year. While I had a plan from the beginning, things definitely did not go the way I intended. I knew I had to try something unique to compete against you fantasy geniuses so ignoring a category seemed logical in a H2H format. But I knew I didn’t want to go the traditional route of drafting Dwight Howard and ignoring FT%, so after careful consideration I chose to ignore points. The irony is by ignoring this category I had a horrible team FT% anyway, so that shows what I know.

Bilbo used what was left of his YeeBA cash to take his son to Disneyland

Cam: Winning a Fantasy Basketball League, especially the YeeBA with veteran managers, does require luck. But it seems as if you really took a risk drafting the way you did.

James/Bilbo: I was extremely optimistic about the draft because people tended to overvalue scorers and ignore guys that get good stats but don’t average 20+ points. I had some good picks (Odom and Varejao) and some shitty ones (Brendan Haywood and Johnny Flynn) but overall I liked my team.

Cam: Your team was middle of the pack during the regular season finishing in sixth place. But in the playoffs your guys turned it on winning all three rounds. Let the readers know how your season went.

James/Bilbo: Things were going well and I was winning the categories I expected, but then the injury bug hit me. Rondo severely sprained his ankle in December and missed a few weeks. Then both my bigs went down (Camby & Noah). Then I lost Varejao for the year and I really thought I was done. Just trying to make up the 30+ board per game these guys generated seemed impossible. And yet I somehow hung on to 6^th place. But I knew I had to make a move to get into the playoffs, so for the second year in a row I got the best of Toomie in a trade. He needed 3’s so I gave him Ryan Anderson and Jason Terry for Holla Holla Iguodola who was the new point forward in Philly. With the return of Noah and Camby I had just enough to get into the playoffs. And by just enough I mean that the team I beat out had ONE more loss than me. That works out to .003 percentage points. Crazy.

Cam: You got that right! We were all making fun of you for barely qualifying for the playoffs with your team that you were originally so confident about. But you knew that with the renewed health of your players that your team was actually rolling. Tell us about that playoff run.

James/Bilbo: By trading away my 3’s I had a third category I was weak in. Luckily three’s could be had on the waiver wire so I rode Mike Bibby through the first 2 rounds, barely beating two exceptional managers. Then it was me and Oaktown, the other dark horse team that stormed through the playoffs. Not only were our team names oddly related (James' team name: Ghetto Physics), so too were our team strengths. It was a fierce battle, but in the end, I won by a narrow margin managing a couple of blocks more than my sexy opponent. You should have seen the victory party we had that night in The Shire. It was epic.

Bilbo beat the guy in the middle in the semi's (Bilbo on right)

Cam: Pipeweed and Hobbit Beer for the entire block! What a fiesta. What are your final thoughts on all of this?

James/Bilbo: I guess my team was built to barely win, which did cause me a lot of stress, but it did prove that being a little unconventional can sometimes work. Now, if I could just do a little better in the Nextians league, maybe I could be a fantasy MVM like Toomie!

Cam: You would have needed to finish higher than 7th in The Nextians League. Regardless, congratulations on an exciting playoff run and thank you for spending time in the Nextian Grotto for this interview.

James/Bilbo: I love the new spa jets you put in here and have always enjoyed the waitresses.

Chris Paul Is Better Than Kobe In Crunch Time

2011-04-25T11:21:00.000-07:00

One of the more entertaining NBA Nerd arguments this season has been the analysis of Crunch Time stats. Super stat-geeks say that someone like Kevin Martin of the Rockets is more valuable in Crunch Time while most players, coaches and GM's would prefer Kobe or LeBron with the nod given to Bryant as a sign of respect.

But when you look at actual team execution, the Two Time Defending Champion Lakers perform in the middle of the pack while the New Orleans Hornets are the most efficient scorers of the basketball. As luck would have it, the Hornets and Lakers are playing each other in the first round of the playoffs and CP3 executed brilliantly at the end of yesterday's win to even the series 2-2.

Please PEEP Henry Abbott's analysis and be sure to read/watch the Sebastian Pruiti breakdown of this Crunch Time game deciding play.

The OG Nextian is here to give you the ammo needed to refute the Laker Fans.

Top 10 Bloopers of the Season

2011-04-17T14:15:00.001-07:00

THE Nextians Fantasy League Champion '10/'11 Season

2011-04-15T16:55:00.000-07:00

Defending Nextians Champ gladly hands Electric Guitar Trophy to THE Curry Turkey

Cam: Scotty Effing Toomasson! Congrats on winning the ‘10/’11 We Got Next Fantasy Basketball 12 Manager Annual Rotisserie League of Awesomeness. I know that the Fantasy NBA League you Commission is a Head To Head League where you finished the regular season with the best record but ended up beating your's truly for 3rd place. This has caused Timmay to vote you the Most Valuable Manager this year. And since Timmay is the Czar of the MVM vote, congrats on that as well.

MVM Czar anoints his '10/'11 Award Winner

Toomie: Thanks, brutha! I really enjoyed the Nextians season -- true rotisserie is still the best format, IMO... Timmay made we sweat things out a little at the end there (four-way tie for FG% going into the final day?!) , but all in all I think I had a pretty dominant run.

Cam: What would you say was your key to the ‘ship? You drafted really well.

Toomie: It never hurts to have the #1 pick. Unless it's football. The Durantula lived up to his billing as the #1 ranked player finishing #2 overall (I think?). He was HUGE in the PTs and FT% categories.

Drafting Kevin Love in the 4th round (#48) overall was fu*king steal. He singlehandedly won me the REBs title.

Serge Ibaka-Nacka in the 10th round? Solid...

THE Curry Turkey shoves it in the face of THE Pippen Ain't EZ (3rd Place)

Cam: Solid indeed! Now tell me about your trades. You were definitely wheeling and dealing this season making more trades than anyone else in The Nextians league. Usually that title goes to someone near the bottom just doing anything they can to move out of the doldrums. But your trades won you all the damn money. So much damn money!

Toomie: My keys to victory were BOTH a solid draft and a couple key trades:

Trading Al-Jeff for Monta was awesome -- a true need-for-need deal that worked out both me and the Cammish. Who knew they'd both end up top 10 players, but damn, Monta really matured this year -- in fantasy and reality.

I'd have to say the key deal -- and props to the Nextian Summit for providing the fertile trade grounds -- was my Tyreke/Hibbert for Manu Manu Manu. (I could do no wrong after the best T-Shirt (Rambis) fell to me in the draft at #2)

I dealt Hibbert and Evans at their peak, though Ginobili went downhill just a tad as well after the trade... Both he and Monta were awesome in the 3's, STLs, and FT% categories mid-season and down the stretch.

And once I moved Love for PTs and ASTs, (Iguodala and Andre Miller), it was all over. I had enough in the other categories locked up so moving Love was no problem.

Off the record: I don't know why anyone in the league trades with me! I ALWAYS get the better of the deal (sarcasm).

Cam: Your winnings will be coming to you shortly. Make sure not to blow it all at the track and maybe take that little lady of yours out to some fine dining!

Toomie: Seriously, great season everyone! I’m looking forward to defending my title next year.

--THE Curry Turkey
‘10/’11 Most Valuable Manager (MVM) of Nextians/YeeBA Seasons, World Muthafkin’ Champ of The Nextians

The Basketball Jones: In Memoriam

2011-04-14T16:25:00.000-07:00

TBJ is a hilarious nearly daily show on The Score Network. Here, the Intern on Guitar and Tas on Recorder play some beautiful music while Skeets, undoubtedly, edits the In Memoriam clips to go along with the music.

Enjoy your butts off watching this one.

TBJ: NBA In Memoriam 2010 - 2011 from The Basketball Jones on Vimeo.

Norm McDonald does Blake Griffiin

2011-04-14T15:40:00.001-07:00

LOL's!

Kobe Bryant: Homophobia-Gate

2011-04-14T11:52:00.000-07:00

Step 1: cut a hole in the box. Step 2: watch the video below and pay attention to the Kobe-slur at the 0:34 mark:

Referee Bennie Adams was the recipient of the words. All signs are pointing to Adams not being gay, by the way, so Kobe was more off mark with his anger filled post-toddler tantrum slur than he was in the 4th Quarter of Game 7 of the 2010 NBA Finals.

Czar Stern quickly smacked Kobe with a $100,000 fine saying:
"Kobe Bryant’s comment during last night’s game was offensive and inexcusable. While I’m fully aware that basketball is an emotional game, such a distasteful term should never be tolerated. … Kobe and everyone associated with the NBA know that insensitive or derogatory comments are not acceptable and have no place in our game or society."

Kobe then went on to make what I call a "Star Apology". This is where the star's ego just won't let them admit that they are wrong and they first explain their side of the story and apologize only to "those who they may have offended." The Star Apology isn't a real apology. This is especially true in Kobe's case since it was a statement released through the Laker organization:

"What I said last night should not be taken literally. My actions were out of frustration during the heat of the game, period. The words expressed do NOT reflect my feelings towards the gay and lesbian communities and were NOT meant to offend anyone"

(Please note that capitalizing the word "not" is meant as an inflection. DUH)

Kobe doesn't get it. He doesn't realize that he shouldn't be saying this word at any time. It's kind of like non-black people dropping the N-Bomb. We live in America and our culture says that if you use any of these words you are an asshole, even if you do apologize for your mistake pretty well. Period point blank. ASSHOLE. Well, Kobe didn't apologize well and I hope there's some techno songs written about Kobe where this slur of his can live on and not just "go away" like Kobe hopes it will.

His refusal to really apologize is indeed disturbing. Maybe he thinks that money (paying the $100K fine to the Czar) will make it all go away. It seemed to have worked before.

Charlie Villanueva Goes Nuts

2011-04-12T09:48:00.000-07:00

Charlie Villanueva (6th man on the Detroit Pistons, Haitian who loves his homeland, benefactor of Joe Dumars handing out money-fest 2009, Kevin Garnett punching bag) is fed up. The Pistons have had a tough go of it this year and this fight is definitely seen as a venting of all that went wrong. Charlie took out his frustrations on Ryan Hollins of The Cavs last night and only Rodney Stuckey (Point Guard!! Does this explain Villa-nu-nu's weakness on the boards?) could hold him back. Thankfully, someone put the video to a sweet soundtrack that will keep you fist pumping for minutes:

But then things got even crazier in the bowels of The Palace of Auburn Hills:

Villanueva stormed onto the court and toward the Cleveland bench before he was restrained by several members of the Pistons staff. As he was being escorted and practically dragged to the back, Villanueva motioned for Hollins to meet him in the back as he was escorted into the Cavaliers' tunnel.

Hollins remained near the Cavaliers bench and was later escorted to the back.
In the back of the arena, Villanueva was seen running toward the Cavaliers' locker room before being stopped by police on the loading dock. The police used a giant mat to stop the sprinting Villanueva.

Two other police officers dragged Villanueva back to the Pistons' locker room as Villanueva was heard shouting, "I'm going to kill that dude."

Thanks to BDL for all information regarding this story. I'm just a lowly messenger of things that I find interesting.

The LeBrons

2011-04-11T11:00:00.000-07:00

The "hilarious" The LeBrons commercial from a few years back has made it's way into animated form.

I'm pretty darn sure that the makers of The Boondocks took some time off form a show that's actually good to make this stanky piece of web 2.0 marketing veiled in cartoon form. Bing, Gucci, Nike, HP, Intel, Sprite. Good work taking over the world on the way to Billionaire-hood, LBJ.

Recruiting Carlos Boozer

2011-04-05T12:00:00.000-07:00

The Chicago Bulls went all high-tech on Boozer when recruting him last summer. Right before a meeting with the Heat, Chicago sent over a personalized i-pad straight to the Boozehound who was chillaxing in his hotel room.

PEEP THE ARTICLE and enjoy a few quotes from Carlos about the i-pad experience:

"I was going to have dinner with [the Heat], and right at 9 o'clock at night, a dude knocks on my door and I'm like, 'What's poppin'?'"

"It was the kickoff to free agency, so it was pretty dope"

"I still have it," Boozer said of the specialized Bulls iPad. "I have it at my crib here in Chicago. I still have the briefcase and everything."
Word Carlos. Word.

Too Macho

2011-04-04T17:44:00.000-07:00

Henry Abbott, the fearless leader of ESPN's TrueHoop Blog, made an interesting speech at Dork Elvis' Sloan Sports Conference last month. In his presentation he wore a fantastic red tie. He then talked about how the over-emphasis of "macho" in basketball causes decision makers to overlook the less-manly qualities of the game and how a focus on wimpy-ness can be exploited for better output.

Henry starts off with an analysis of how much better Shaq could have been if he could have hit free throws Rick Barry Style. He then moves in to how The Lakers meditate through Zen Master's guidance and are the only team to do so while at the same time being our back to back NBA Champions (coinkadink?). The "Chris Paul in Crunchtime" debate is brought up again as the Hornets are far and away the most effective crunchtime team over the past 5 years. Henry cites an NYT article about how NBA teams who touch eachother more (high fives, butt slaps, hugs, chest bumps) have better win percentages. Skinny players are often overlooked commodities to NBA decision makers for some reason even though skinny dudes are awesome (I keep telling myself that and now I finally have validation). Lastly, Abbott discusses the potential of female leadership in the game being a catylist for more effective teaching of impressionable millionaires.

PEEP THE VIDEO HERE . It's totally worth the time.........if only to gaze into Henry's dreamy eyes and envision giving him a chest bump after he posts another awesome blog post. Wait a second, scratch that last sentence.

Congrats to Chris Mullin

2011-04-04T16:58:00.000-07:00

Although the 2007 We Believe Team PR Push wasn't successful when he was the GM of The Warriors, Chris Mullin has made it into the Basketball Hall of Fame. Please play the Mully highlight package below and turn up your speakers to enjoy the theme song: